I usually consider myself a pretty brave person. I’ve faced a lot of difficulty in my life as a single parent, raising two sons. I don’t think of myself as being fearful, but this week I had a revelation that I am indeed acting of my fears.

My son, Jon, and I were driving to dinner one night this week when he made a comment that hit a nerve. “Why don’t you give me more credit, Ma?”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“You don’t give me enough credit. I can handle things and think I am pretty smart. I am going to be 25 you know.”

Yep, that is true. So why am I constantly making suggestions to him? No one wants to be told what to do about their lives, right? And especially not a 25 year old young adult male.

I realized I am reacting out of fear when I have expectations of others: fear that they are not going to do the right thing. And then when they don’t, my fears are confirmed. I think it boils down to the old idea of getting what you expect.

I’ve decided to take a new approach and start thinking more positively about people and having faith that they can take care of themselves and that they know what is best for them. Stop trying to play God by telling others what they should and shouldn’t do. We are all responsible for our actions and their consequences and that’s how we learn and grow, right?

Today I am going to trust God more in this area. Trust my loved ones in their abilities to make their own choices and let go of this responsibility. I think I will be more content and so will they!

As Paul says in Phil 4:8-9, “Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think on these things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard or seen from me put it into practice and the peace of God will be with you.”

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One thought on “Fear Not

  1. Good wisdom. We have a son that will be 25 this year, too. It is hard sometimes to watch them step out and make mistakes. But, we did it and survived, and they will, too. And it helps me to think that God loves our kids even more than we possibly can. No one has more desire for them to do well than the Heavenly Father! Good post.

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